Love is not an emotion, it is a decision.This shift in my point of view lets me renew my dedication to my husband and our relationship in a empowered and intentional way. Gratefully, I can settle on a day to day basis whether or not I require to love all those who cross my path, or not.
The practice of loving in the face of crabbiness, indifference, and even anger takes strength and vulnerability. It is not simple. It takes patience and persistence. One time snubbed, it is simple to get on the defensive or withdraw.
The decision to stay the work than be thrown off by outside circumstances is a way to peace. It can be a hard fought path, but it is well worth it.
Today I was speaking to anyone who thought that all would be well, if only people would act right! I do know that urge. It is give a convincing argument! Here’s the rub; if other people are the issue, I am sunk!
What do we do then when our mate is in his/her own world, if it is exactly the most inconvenient TIME! How can we release expectation & permit them the space to be themselves?
One way is breath. Another is seeking a bigger picture. We don’t know what our mate’s lesson is. If they go in an fix things, we could be robbing them from a valuable lesson.
The more that we can see that “The Other Person is YOU” the more free we are to be compassionate and know that we are capable of great harm and great good.
I used to get so irritated when I would get cut of by drivers until I got to see that I can sometimes drive like a lunatic, ! I can expand that awareness to my husband & others that are close to me & give them a wide but loving berth.
I can also expand this compassion to individuals who have harmed me. I can relax knowing that they were doing the best they could with the tools that they had, like me on any given day. Sometimes they act ungracefully, unskillfully, & harmfully. If I emit compassion towards the one that harmed me if it is in the PAST, they lose the power to unnerve me in the present & future. Consequently, I forgive myself as an added benefit!
Next time somebody is crabby with you, give them a shot of that highest love. This is the love that asks for nothing in return. When you have succeeded with a stranger or acquaintance, celebrate your success and then try it on you mate! Do it over and over and over again until it works. When it works, celebrate! Then ask your mate the way it was for them.
Keep in mind, this type of love is calm and desires nothing in return. It is not badgering or explaining your love.